The Rumination of (My) Darkness

Day 55

Saturday

Slowing down is not my M.O. Considering I thought the perfect way to celebrate my graduation from the grips of UVA was to bike across the country and build homes, I can’t say I’m handling the pace of life on crutches with the grace I wish I could muster. So much for my concern about where I would go and what I would do during my weeklong vacation, the hobbling situation seems to have resolved that quite nicely. Trip to the grocery store, 2 hours. Walk to the beach (not including walking along the beach) 1.5 hours. Etc. So I have the lovely opportunity to fill my time traveling from place to place. I won’t keep up the Debbie Downer attitude because that doesn’t encourage me to get out of bed everyday, knowing a whole lot of hobbling awaits me. Rather, here I’ll glorify the tortoise. Life in slow motion. We’ve made a movement to support Slow Food, why not support Slow Life.

Broken tiles. White and red. In an alternating checkered pattern. The middle row is loose. That is what I’ve been tripping over all the late mornings I hustle to work on the main street to the train.

Parrots hide in the palm trees on the beach. I’ve always run by the palm trees, never loitering long enough to actually hear their song. But on one of my many breathers on my beach walk they serenaded me, while I unclenched my hands from the silly stilts.

Aqua jogging. Heavy pendulum limbs swing in alternating calibration, moving slower than time. Racing through my void of suspended motion and mechanical movement I see rampant glances between the life guard and a young boy, flying faster than a heart beat. Watching love happen again and again and again at each sight.

The allure of the slow life…when your own motion falls away, other bodies take on captivating brilliance, when your own light dims, the light of others falls in stark relief on your path. More than light and more than bodies traverse your void, furtive glances, exhalations of exhaustion, the bite of a nervous lip and the song of a hidden bird jump out at you from your dark center. And life takes on a day dream like quality. The dormant body housing the circus of the mind and the intrusion of fantasy sparked by life experience.

Thank you for shining the illuminating warmth of love and compassion on me :)