Spanning the Spectrum

Day 79

Tuesday

I believe in the age of innocence. It is 1st grade. They’re so adorable to the point that even if they have mis-behaved they’re so darn cute your mean face just melts away the minute their big eyes widen in fear of punishment. And they love freely and extravagantly. It was the class hug I received when I peeked into 1st grade A at 10am for English that made me a believer in the age of innocence. One smile and one “Seño! (teacher)” gleefully screeched aroused the room and before my grin stretched ear to ear I was wrapped by little arms in an enormous group hug that was more like a leg hug because the short darlings really didn’t reach higher than my hips. And so of course we had fun in class. They told me about their toys, completely forgetting we had learned about toys before the break. Regardless of their reversion to monolinguism I was in a good mood, we played games and I assume they re-learned something.

4th grade was a different story. I don’t believe in hating anything, that is simply wasted energy. So I won’t say I hate 4th grade B, but rather say, what a wonderful challenge they are presenting me with. Dare I say that they are IMPOSSIBLE to teach, yes I do. Having failed to hold their attention as I tried to teach them science English I decided to scrap the science game plan for an impromptu lesson on RESPECT. As we waited in the hall for the monitor to open the door to 4th grade B the students told me “perdon” (sorry) for being so rude before break when I walked out of the classroom for the principal and said I refused to continue teaching the class on my own because of their vile behavior. I was hoping their apologies meant they had changed for the better…but alas, change is slow. Very slow. Still carrying a chip on my shoulder towards them I had my ice queen face on and walked into the classroom and wrote in huge letters on the board ‘RESPECT.’ And waited for them to remember I was the teacher and they were the students. The principal had kindly sent an aide to sit in the class with me (instead of coming herself as she should). I began to ask them what they thought respect meant and for the next hour we struggled through defining respect, discussing who we respect and why. Then I assigned them homework (big mistake). I asked them to write a 2 page essay on Respect. As if I were a full moon, the pack of wolves that was the class began to howl at me, ‘2 pages? 2 pages?” unable to believe that I would dare ask that much of them. Still pissed as hell at them I said, “If one more person asks me if it is really 2 pages, I will double it to 4 pages.” And told them to begin immediately. As expected, they didn’t begin. They roamed the class, they taunted classmates, they laughed loudly and they all asked to go to the bathroom. In between my demands for silence I laughed with the aide sitting with me, she noted, “they really haven’t realized why they’re learning about respect, have they?” “No, no, they still don’t get it” I said, disappointed. 12:59:59 I shouted that I wanted the homework next week and I fled, 1 hour done.

I wonder if I could get an ex-Marine to come be my aide, I think he’d be rather effective in disciplinary techniques and teaching respect.

; )